The Value of Postpartum Support

The Value of Postpartum Support

by Rebecca Servoss

In most social situations with adults, one of the first questions people ask each other is “What do you do?” When I answer, “I am a Postpartum Doula”, I usually get one of three responses. A) A blank stare. B) A quizzical look hinting for further expansion, or C) A recognition of the word “doula” followed by a story of how their sister/friend had a doula who they “couldn’t have done it without”. This lack of recognition of just what exactly IS a Postpartum Doula is just one reflection of the need for Postpartum Support. In mainstream American culture, there is a great excitement and build-up to the day of the birth. The lives of the parents-to-be are filled with gifts, parties, and advice from friends and family, and educational resources and outreach from both public and private sources on matters of birthing their child, pain management, infant feeding, and parenting methods. But what happens in the days after the baby is born or the family returns home from the hospital?

After a baby’s birth, the new family’s world is often a maelstrom of joy, doubt, fatigue, elation, and reflection. Relatives and friends often surround families. While the love of extended family is irreplaceable, the new parents may feel overwhelmed at times by the presence of the many opinions, advice, and expectations of their extended family. Unfortunately, the presence of extended family may not facilitate the protection of a quiet, relaxing space for mother and baby or new family as a whole to rest and establish breastfeeding. I do believe a support person for the mother and baby needs to be trained in what to do at this time, whether it is passed down through generations of women-knowledge, or taught in classes as our doula training is. This alleviates the new mother of having to tell everyone what she needs all the time, which is not relaxing. Also, following the birth of the baby, families are bombarded with corporate/cultural imagery of “the new family”. Formula campaigns, diaper commercials, and baby clothing companies show happy, quiet, thriving families. When times get really tough in our own households during the postpartum period, we are subliminally linked to these commercials as an answer to breastfeeding problems, diaper rash, and colic. This is overlapped with the advice of family, friends, and medical professionals. Where does a new family turn? There is a strange unbalance of too much and not enough information.

Postpartum support from an individual who is willingly giving their time to the new family’s adjustment is invaluable. I feel proud to be a Postpartum Doula because I feel my role as a maven is a comforting and static presence in a time of such great change and uncertainty. I see my job as taking the many strands of a family’s life and giving them the tools to weave it all together into a succinct picture that they are comfortable with. I am there to listen to a mother’s birth story and reflections on her experience and to support her role. I have the skills to recognize Postpartum Depression and offer resources if necessary. I aid other family members in supporting the new mother’s journey with feeding her baby and adjusting to her new body. I am a resource on normal infant characteristics to a partner who is worried about newborn care. I am educated in both breastfeeding and alternative infant feeding and can recognize the signs of a breastfeeding dyad that needs help or is feeding successfully. I am a resource for the local health care options for mother and baby as well as a resource for the “gear”, from car seats, clothes and diapering options, to breast pump rental, maternity clothes, and breast pads. I am there to help the family organize their lives a bit, from what they will eat for dinner tonight to how to support their three year old through this transition. As a Postpartum Doula, I can assess the needs of the home and find ways to support all members of the family in a time when all the attention is primarily focused on the baby. I am an advocate for the new family when they are confused or have too many visitors, and I am someone who can gently guide parents back to their own intuition during times of doubt. My role, in its highest success, creates a stability that is calming and non judgmental, allowing the family to find their own confidence.

In a time where women are striving for autonomy, are wholly self-sufficient, and serve as the sometimes-invisible backbone of their families, they need postpartum support dearly. Many women expect themselves to be running around again, taking care of it all a week after the baby is born. It is an honor for me to be able to create some space for the mother, to settle in to her new life, to offer a non-judgmental ear, a quiet compassion, and a remembrance of her right to rest, heal, and enjoy these first few weeks and months with her new baby. I am also honored to take some weight off the family by being available not only to the mother, but to the whole family. The postpartum time is one of, if not the greatest, transition of a family’s life together. Having support during this time can help create a home life that can set many healthy standards; caring for one another, carrying equal weight, paying attention to proper nutrition and sleep habits, and not being afraid to ask for, or accept help.